Ex-Miss California Carrie Prejean wanted nothing more than to win the Miss America title and go on to spread the word of Jesus to all her righteous countrymen. Unfortunately for her, there were so many people treading on the wrong paths who just didn’t want for her to be the second Virgin Mary. These vile and evil creatures (gays and lesbians, for the uninitiated) hurled cruel words at her because of her strong belief that they were threatening the holy sanctimony of marriage. Imagine anyone wanting to get married to someone of the same sex just because they are in love; it’s blasphemy!

Such devoted and holy Christians like Prejean live only with the desire to make the world a safe haven for all the straight and homophobic of the world. If, in the process, a few million LGBTs are hurt, humiliated, tortured, raped, and killed, then this world has not lost much. After all, there would still be plenty straight people making babies like crazy so the human species would never become extinct. Prejean’s ill-spoken speeches against the community must have impressed the Pope and certainly convinced all the religious extremists to place her high up on a pedestal. When her nude photos started circulating on the net, Prejean’s supporters declared them photoshopped and some even forgave them as a mistake from her childhood. All she needed to do was whisper a few Hail Mary’s and her sins would be forgiven by the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost.

Prejean was such a pure daughter of the faith that she even demanded millions from the Miss California Pageant for dethroning her and revealing to reporters that she had undergone breast enlargement. Having a few million dollars would have been great; self-righteous and angelic Prejean could have started a Straight Church but it now appears that she only needs her faith. Prejean has settled out of court with the Pageant officials after a hardcore sex tape of Prejean having a great time on her own made its way into the discussion. Ah, these damned LGBTs will stop at nothing to destroy the image of Our Lady of Abstinence.

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Via: NewsBlaze